Hefty Lefty Wants to Direct the Jets

Published on 14-Aug-2015 by Towner Park
Football - NFL / NFL Daily Opinion

There's a ring on that finger that no other Jet has.

As if the Green & White Circus needs another act.

But, hell, this one could make a huge splash.

I mean, have you seen the size of this dude?

Given the nickname Hefty Lefty, I think most can get a full visual, here. And besides, dude's already played in the Big Apple and can handle a verdant look.

So why wouldn't Jared Lorenzen offerhis services to the New York Jets via Twitter? There's always room for one more in the clown car.

Jared Lorenzen

Geno Smith can't complain, mostly because his jaw will be wired shut for a while.

News flash: Pay your bills, dude. Especially the ones you can cover from your front pocket. Stuff like that will start to show up on credit reports of a certain kind.

My opinion on the dust-up? Not surprising. You confine 90 alpha males who have probably been spoiled since they discovered they are athletically superior than most inside a locker room for an amount of time, and something bad is bound to happen.

Regardless, the Jets need a quarterback to start the season. Enter Lorenzen, or so he desires.

Dude's now listed at 320 lbs.

That's one meatball sandwich away from trying out for the Dallas Cowboys offensive line. Or running through it.

And remember, Lorenzen's got something no other Jet has: a Super Bowl ring.

Chew on that, Jets.

And Geno, I repeat: next time, pay the man.

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