Matt Nagy Sings the After Hours Version of Take Me Out to the Ballgame

Chicago Bears head coach Matt Nagy really likes to push the envelope with an aggressive offensive approach.

He appears to follow this philosophy off the field as well.

The reigning NFL Coach of the Year was invited to Wrigley Field recently to toss out the ceremonial first pitch and then eventually dazzle the crowd during the seventh-inning stretch.

Things got off to a fine start, as the enthusiastic Nagy was able to negotiate the first pitch without incident.

 

Yep, that was solid, especially when compared to just about any other first pitch in recorded history.

 

Sadly, things took a turn for the surreal and the vulgar later in the game.

The still fired-up Nagy and his children gathered in the booth for Take Me Out To The Ballgame, when the lives of everyone in attendance were forever changed in ways they can't even begin to fathom.

 

That was a Freudian slip of epic proportions, although there wasn't any mention of an Oedipus complex.

 

There isn't one single person alive who doubts for a second that Nagy said penis instead of peanuts, as the double-takes and awkward side glances in the crowd would seem to confirm.

 

This was one of those moments where you're not quite sure if you heard or saw something, but you most certainly did.

 

Once you establish this as fact, other questions emerge, such as why Coach Nagy was asking the crowd to pay for the penis instead of simply purchasing the penis himself.

His large pal and mentor Andy Reid is no doubt filled with shame and mass quantities of butter at the thought of his protege engaging in such behavior.

 

If these cravings continue, Nagy could always contact Serge Ibaka, assuming Kawhi Leonard didn't finish all of the bull dick before fleeing to Los Angeles.