Let's All Enjoy Some Vintage Cleveland Browns Dysfunction, Which Once Included Office Porn
Despite the best efforts of meddling owner Jimmy Haslam, the Cleveland Browns actually appear to be operating like a competent, well-adjusted NFL franchise these days.
While the organization seems to have turned a corner with the help of top pick Baker Mayfield, we still have reams of evidence documented their previous cartoonish dysfunction.
ESPN decided to be useful for once, recently completing an extremely thorough report on the inner workings of the Browns.
The Mothership really plumbed the depths of this clown car, unearthing several fun nuggets of ineptitude.
Our personal favorite would have to be the following anecdote, which seems impossible until you remember we're discussing the Cleveland Browns.
The Cleveland Browns marketing folks accidentally projected hardcore porn for 20+ minutes in its office. They didn't know what (hashtag D P) would return & they didn't know how to turn it off? MY GOD, was someone's sweet little grandmother running the marketing department?🤯🤣
— Kirk J. Angel (@kirkjangel) January 25, 2019
Well, in their defense, what else could those two letters possibly reference?
Close, but not quite.
Indeed, a few years back, the crack staff at Browns HQ decided it would be a swell idea to check the pulse of their long-suffering fan base.
Sadly, they chose that most unfortunate hashtag to conduct their search, resulting in an impromptu bachelor party breaking out in the office.
This array of porn was broadcast to the entire office for around 20 minutes before these geniuses figured out how to make it stop.
Unfortunately, there was no time for any interspecies erotica.
While success on the field has been fleeting for our favorite franchise, they've apparently redefined casual Fridays for office drones everywhere.
Reportedly, former head coach Hue Jackson's dismissal had nothing to do with his 3-36-1 record with the Browns, but was in fact directly related to his lack of participation in casual Fridays.
Or maybe he was just into a different type of pornography.