The Gronk Says He's Retiring ... Apparently
So, the modern-day wonderment starts again.
Does he really mean it?
OG's always harp that words used to stand for something. Like when Joe Namath said he guaranteed the New York Jets would beat the Baltimore Colts in Super Bowl III, he had a plan.
Well, he did. And they did.
Since then, the only jock of consequence who meant what he said and was in prime position to do something about it was Mark Messier, captain of the 1994 New York Rangers.
Since then, talk's been cheap.
Guaranteeing victories is kinda the sports version of let's have lunch sometime.
Nowadays, in these ultra-cynical times when credibility has hit new lows, what are we to make that New England Patriots TE for the Ages Rob Gronkowski announces he's hanging up his cleats for good?
Well, for one, we should hope that next time, he learns word economy can go a long way toward preventing eyestrain.
That reads like a damn Oscar acceptance speech.
Is this for real, then, or just some version of sports jock hot flash?
- It's common knowledge Gronk's been contemplating retirement from the game for a couple of years.
- We know his girlfriend's all for it.
- We're guessing Gisele's all for it, hoping that her hubby will take a hint and hang 'em up, too.
Isn't that just a subtle cry for concussion protocol, Super Bowl LIII victory or no?
Maybe Gronkowski's recognized that career earnings of $54million do mean it's time to enjoy the rest of what life has to offer.
And hell, there's still lotsa stuff for him to spike out there.
Frankly, there are better venues than parade buses to play touchy-feely with the girlfriend ...
... so why not just remove that possibility once and for all?
It's already in the been-there-done-that bin.
Kinda like all this stuff, too:
Not enough athletes have the moxie to go out on top, especially while they still have a functioning body.
- Sandy Koufax did, to ensure he still had a working left arm for the rest of his life.
- Even John Elway did, to ensure ... what? ... that he could make millions instead of billions?
- And Peyton Manning did, because TV commercials.
Already bets are being made on when Gronk unretires.
Really, why shovel dirt off the career casket before an honorable burial's even been completed?
Dude's had a one-team career. How rare is that? In fact, how awesome is that!
Gronk will be 30 in May. Not sure what that'd be in horse years, but he'd have a lot more fun doing the Justify thing in his prime and going out to stud whenever the mood strikes.
Even on Sundays and the occasional Thursday.
So enough of this talk about unretiring. Instead, praise him for compiling a Hall of Fame career in his 20s and then getting out in one piece.
Otherwise, someone from the dark side might actually talk him into it.
Yes, that someone.
Resist and enjoy, dude. Live the dream without interruption.