Cody Parkey Can Still Smack the Hell out of a Goalpost
Anyone out there with a kicker fetish may want to listen up.
Cody Parkey is back.
After Cairo Santos failed spectacularly in a game against the Bills, the Tennessee Titans are looking to yet another ex-Bears kicker for salvation.
And wouldn't you know it, this deeply flawed logic is already producing comic gold.
You may recall the ill-fated Parkey pounding uprights last year in Chicago, including his grand finale in the NFC Wild Card Game at Soldier Field:
The NFL officially changes Cody Parkey's missed field goal to a blocked kick by Treyvon Hester
— Bleacher Report (@BleacherReport) January 7, 2019
(via @Eagles)pic.twitter.com/IdMCp65W5B
It was technically grazed by an Eagle, but you get the gist.
Anyway, the popular Today Show guest has quickly re-established a rapport with the poles:
CODY PARKEY THE DOINK KING STRIKES AGAIN #Titans #Bears100 pic.twitter.com/gnsl1TZIlE
— Zachary Macdonald (@Zzzzzzaaaaach) October 20, 2019
Jeez, the announcer actually labeled him the Doink King, which is just really mean.
If only there was a way for Parkey to monetize this unique skill.
Instead, it only brings scorn and derision:
Cody Parkey on the bench after hitting another upright pic.twitter.com/5jfPEx7SOC
— adam ferrone (@_rone) October 20, 2019
We'll pay for his therapy ourselves.
I cannot believe that Cody Parkey doinked it ALREADY! Are you kidding me? pic.twitter.com/vXrQMxvbaO
— Vinnie Parise (@VinnieParise) October 20, 2019
The victim support group meets every other Tuesday.
Titans kicker Cody Parkey just hit the upright with an extra point.
— Michael David Smith (@MichaelDavSmith) October 20, 2019
I bet if Cody Parkey tried to hit the goal post on purpose he couldn't do it as many times as he's done it on accident.
We can only assume this isn't by design.