Match Eludes Uruguay's Grasp as France Advances to Semi-Finals

Some people wake up in the middle of the night drenched in a cold sweat because they were startled by a scary dream.

Usually about a creepy clown, for some damn reason.

Those dudes really know how to trend.

Uruguayan 'keeper Fernando Muslera could only hope his nightmare would feature a clown.

 

Baseball buffs would say dude just had a dreaded Bill Buckner moment. Football fans would shiver at the thought of a Lorius Karius déjà vu on the big stage.

At least Muslera's howler didn't directly cost Uruguay their quarterfinal match against France, but it sorta sealed the deal.

 

La Celeste had enough trouble before the match even got underway.

PSG's Edinson Cavani couldn't answer the bell due to a calf injury, a huge blow to a side that struggles for scoring opportunities as it is.

His absence also exposed Uruguay's lack of depth. Dudes actually took command in Nizhny Novgorod for the first 10 minutes. After that, the French gained control and began to create opportunities, one of which turned lethal.

In the 40th minute, Antoine Griezmann floated a precise free kick straight to Raphael Varane's head. Cristhian Stuani couldn't get there in time, and Les Bleus were on the board with a lead they'd never relinquish:

Uruguay wasted no time showing their desperation in the second half, but the finishing just wasn't there, as the absence of Cavani was becoming more glaring by the minute.

On the pitch, La Celeste couldn't solve French 'keeper Hugo Lloris. Dude was a virtual wall:

 

At the other end, in the 61st Minute, Griezmann -- on the age-old premise that you just never know -- fired a heatseeker straight to Muslera's hands.

Not into. Just to. And then, kinda through:

 

Surely, his parents will still love him. No indication that he'll go into a witness protection program.

But there's also no question he'll be buying his own drinks in the foreseeable future.

Uruguay still tried to mount a challenge, but the air was outta their sails. Or something like that.

 

A telling indication of how done they were could be seen in the expression of José María Giménez, who was already crying by the 80th minute.

 

Even with five minutes of injury time, the South Americans couldn't put anything together, so France became the first team to book their place in the semis.

Not only do Les Bleus belong there -- because 0-2 -- but dudes look like they belong there. This is indeed the World Cup's artistic side of the bracket.

And yet, it's still capable of producing horror. Now and forever.