Zeke Elliott Leaves His Bath Towel at Home on Thanksgiving

The Dallas Cowboys were victims of holiday malaise on Thanksgiving Day against the Buffalo Bills.

Of course, a more likely explanation is that the Bills are much better at football than the Cowboys.

Whatever the case, it didn't go well, although one wonders if they might've benefited from the presence of Zeke Elliott's giant bath towel.

Perhaps we should elaborate.

 

Last weekend in Foxboro, the Cowboys also played like complete shit.

With the rainy conditions conspiring against them, Zeke decided to battle the elements with an assist from a conspicuously large towel:

 

This is a question that needs to be explored, if only to satisfy our own curiosity.

Obviously, a hand towel was probably necessary, but that thing was practically beach-sized.

Clearly, dude had his reasons.

 

One theory was that TCU head coach Gary Patterson was nearby sweating profusely, but he was probably somewhere in Texas recovering from that loss to Oklahoma:

 

It simply doesn't add up.

Similar questions were being asked across the Interwebs:

 

 

 

We may never know the truth.