FIFA to Uruguay: Two of Those Jersey Stars Have Gotta Go

They'd better not be expecting Luis Suárez to take a bite outta his own jersey.

Nor anyone else involved with the Uruguay national football program.

It seems like football's ruling body has this quaint notion that if a side happens to win one of their tournaments, FIFA should have the right to say how that team touts its achievement.

 

The World Cup didn't come into being until 1930, when none other than La Celeste -- the Sky Blue -- emerged from the field of 13 teams -- with all matches played in their capital of Montevideo -- to claim the first trophy.

Dudes bagged out on defending their crown in 1934 because the venue was Italy and so few European teams refused to take the trip -- and their expense accounts -- to their party four years' prior. This thinned-down field, of course, was one reason why the USA finished in third place in that one.

Uruguay also refused to play in 1938 -- where France was the designated host -- because they'd understood the World Cup would alternate between Europe and South America, and that venue made two tourneys in a row over there.

 

So, being kinda feisty in most things FIFA has sorta become a tradition with those dudes.

They did show up in 1950, journeying across the border to neighboring Brazil and claiming another title. That event's better known, though, to Americans for their cast of XI amateurs shocking England, 1-0.

All told, then, La Celeste has won all of two World Cups.

However, those peering eyes at the game's ivory tower in Zurich seem to have recently noticed that Uruguay's team jersey has four stars signifying Cup titles sewn above their crest.

 

Well, to Uruguay, it does. Here's the logic:

• Dudes point out that before there was a World Cup, FIFA organized the Olympic tournament;
• The gold medalists in that competition were considered de facto world champions;
• La Celeste won Olympic gold in 1924 and 1928;
• Ergo, they earned a FIFA star for each of those triumphs.

 

This matter of recognized championships is being taken much more seriously than what college football in the USA does:

• In 2007, the Washington Huskies noticed their 1960 team beat AP titlists Minnesota in the Rose Bowl that year and unilaterally declared their dudes to be the rightful national champions.
• In 2018, the undefeated UCF Knights decided if they were gonna be shut outta the CFP where they coulda proved their bona fides, they'd just recognize the obvious and anoint themselves.

And everyone was happy.

That's not the way it works in the hallowed world of proper football, so FIFA was clearly left with a choice ...

 

... even though why it had to be made now is still a mystery. FIFA put a rule on the books in 2010 that only World Cup champions can put stars on their jerseys. There have obviously been World Cups since 2010.

Worse, FIFA didn't even tell Uruguay directly. La Celeste got the word from Puma, who's producing their jerseys for the 2024 World Cup run-up. When the jersey was submitted for approval, FIFA instructed them to cut back on the stars.

Uruguay's now diligently busy rounding up documentation to prove their point. However, it might be more effective for them to simply ask one simple question:

When's FIFA ever been on the right side of anything?

And so it is that the sporting world's true Masters of Dickness are showing their true colors yet again.