We Now Know Just How Offended America Was by Adam Levine's Super Bowl Nudity

By all accounts, Super Bowl LIII was more or less a dull slog from a football perspective, with the New England Patriots winning 13-3 over the Los Angeles Rams in a game that was about as exciting as that score would suggest.

However, for a number of reasons, the halftime show proved to be a stimulating source of conversation both on the Interwebs and in living rooms across America.

In an unfortunate development for anyone who appreciates music, Maroon 5 headlined the Pepsi Halftime Show, which of course meant a possibly fatal dose of Adam Levine.

Predictably, the set was a full frontal assault on good taste, as the band provided endless fodder for the Internet hordes to feast upon.

 

 

Okay, that covers fashion.

 

 

 

Same for body art.

 

 

And finally, dancing.

However, it appears that our prudish citizenry was also deeply offended by the brazen indecency of Adam Levine's bare chest.

In fact, out of the 94 total complaints received by the FCC regarding the CBS broadcast of the Super Bowl, more than half of them specifically referenced those exposed nipples.

 

Putting aside the shitty music for a moment, we can all agree that a bare-chested Levine would qualify as bad naked.

 

While this horrifying partial male nudity isn't exactly tearing at the very fabric of our society, many of the formal complaints addressed the apparent double standard pertaining to the vilification of Janet Jackson due to her infamous nip slip.

 

If only Justin Timberlake had been there to cover up Levine.