Mike Francesa's Phone Is Your Ultimate Source for NFL Draft Wisdom
Speaking of phones, the Sports Pope appears to be getting the bulk of his material from his device, as he's apparently unable or unwilling to retain information.
But if you're looking for sharp NFL Draft analysis, you've definitely come to the right place.
Forget about Mel Kiper Jr or Todd McShay, because Big Mike is injecting his expertise directly into your bloodstream.
Prepare to be educated, courtesy of Your Sports Holiness:
Mike Francesa begins talking about the upcoming NFL draft.... quickly realizes that he doesn't know any players in the upcoming NFL draft.... scrolls through his phone to find names of players in the upcoming NFL draft. pic.twitter.com/u5xo3GPtPo— Ƒunhouse (@BackAftaThis) February 27, 2019
That's pure radio dynamite.
Of course, sometimes the Pope seems to forget he's on the air, and we're subjected to radio gold such as the following:
We are treated to 30 seconds of dead air as Mike Francesa tries to find a longshot golfer to wager on in the Honda Classic. Silence is essential in the radio game. pic.twitter.com/taIrQekfq8— Ƒunhouse (@BackAftaThis) February 28, 2019
Yep, that was definitely 30 seconds of silence and gutteral moans before the big guy provided us with his golf wisdom, before then literally reading the PGA schedule for the next couple of months, presumably off of his phone.
A special shoutout to the absolutely essential Funhouse Twitter account, which dutifully keeps a running log of Francesa's nonsense for posterity.
What the hell, here's one more:
It's been almost five years since Mike Francesa learned that soccer players use both legs to kick the ball.— Ƒunhouse (@BackAftaThis) February 27, 2019
As you can imagine, Big Mike keeps the Funhouse pretty busy.