Cowboys' Elliott Prefers Game of Throwdowns

So there most of the USA was recently, hunkered down before their screens in Game of Thrones mode.

However, not everyone's into the screen adaptation of A Song of Ice and Fire.

That includes Dallas Cowboys running back Zeke Elliott.

Allegedly, dude was fighting a DJ in a night club. Given how some fights go in Westeros, that's probably a better choice.

Then again, fights in Westeros aren't real.

And they don't get investigated by the Dallas police.

After, of course, the air had grown pungent with hints and suppositions.

Ultimately, one eyewitness made himself known.

That was none other than Michael Huffman, erstwhile citizen and possible nightclub denizen, who reported what he saw to the Fort Worth Star-Telegram:

[Elliott] didn’t throw the punch ... Zeke was just standing there arms folded chilling, feeling the crowd. Then I seen [the] DJ getting loud toward the vicinity of Zeke and then I see an overhand right come over the back of Zeke shoulder that landed square in [the DJ’s] face and he went to sleep. He didn’t even see it. Then the crowd circled and dispersed. I’m surprised a whole video hasn’t been released yet.

Of course, if there was a whole video, TMZ would've already had it.

Dudes aren't exactly 60 Minutes, but if there's circumstantial evidence to be splayed all over cyberspace, they're the pros.

If any other firsthand observers showed da fuzz anything, it probably would've been a calendar with Sun 10 Sep circled in bold red:

Soon thereafter, the investigation was suspended, which is offical-speak for being dropped.

Seems like the moral of the story was twofold:

• DJ's should let their music do the talking, especially if it's loud talking, and
• American law really does say a person's innocent until proven guilty and casting aspersions is tacky.

Meanwhile, not even a week later, the Cowboys cut the ironically named Lucky Whitehead after he was served wtih a warrant for shoplifting. Naturally, TMZ was right there with the scoop.

The 25-year-old was busted in Prince William County, VA on June 22 for shoplifting/petit larceny under $200. We're told Whitehead allegedly took stuff from a convenience store ... He was ordered to appear in court on July 6, but according to court records he didn't show up -- so a warrant was issued for his arrest. He's since been charged for failure to appear.

We're starting to think My Cousin Vinny should be required viewing in America.

Clearly, all of that wouldn't fit in a TMZ headline at the time.

Turns out there was more to the Whitehead case than met the eye, too. Turns out the actual thief had previously stolen Whitehead's ID and claimed he was the now ex-Cowboy.

TMZ did follow up, but still ...

Case closed.

And see you in the Tri-State area, Lucky.

Too bad the Jets aren't on the Cowboys' schedule.