The Diabolical Grayson Allen Has Graduated to Forearm Shivers in the NBA

Published on 1-Feb-2019 by Raoul Duke

Basketball - NBA    NBA Daily Update

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The Diabolical Grayson Allen Has Graduated to Forearm Shivers in the NBA

This may come as a shock to many hoops enthusiasts, but it turns out that Grayson Allen is currently on an NBA roster.

We have indeed confirmed through multiple channels that the former Duke menace is employed by the Utah Jazz, albeit in a limited capacity.

The popular Ted Cruz impersonator is currently averaging a robust four points a game in ten dynamic minutes per night.

However, we recently learned that Allen now has access to a much larger bag of dirty tricks on the court.


With the Jazz being pantsed by the Trail Blazers in Portland the other night, Allen was actually allowed onto the floor, and quickly reminded us who he was and how he likes to play the game.


Fortunately, we were treated to a number of different angles on the approximately 42 replays provided, so we definitely got a good look at this creative way to stop a fast break.

Just to clarify, under no circumstances would that be considered a basketball play.


In fact, it was an elbow buried into the chest of one Al-Farouq Aminu, who as far as we know did nothing to deserve such treatment.

Some folks on the Interwebs considered it more of a forearm:



Back in college, Allen was more partial to kicking and tripping his opponents, but clearly the NBA is a different animal.


What a classy dude!

Actually, our friend started working on some new stuff during Summer League ball, apparently attempting to place Atlanta's Trae Young in some sort of submission hold.


Get a room, you two.