Angry White Dude: They Can't Be Serious!

Published on 25-Apr-2017 by Larry Cory

Basketball - NBA    NBA Daily Opinion

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Angry White Dude: They Can't Be Serious!

As embarrassing as it is to admit, I listen to sports talk radio.  

To say it stinks does not even begin to express how I really feel about it, but that's another article for another day.

Recently, on one of the shows -- maybe more -- they were talking about changing the rules for the Hack-a-Bricklayer situations that occur on what seems like a regular basis in the NBA.  

Seems like on Sunday, the Thunder had a good shot at beating the Rockets.  

There was just one huge problem: André Roberson can't hit a foul shot!

This dude makes kajillions ,and he can't hit a free throw! I kid you not. 42% from the line for the season.

With the game on the line, the Rockets just kept fouling Robertson; down the stretch, he missed 6 out of 8 and Houston went on to win, 113-109.

I guess for some, it was difficult to watch, but not as difficult has it was for Robertson to make a damn free throw.  

It gets even worse.

Radio knotheads want to change the rules for those times when a player gets fouled away from the ball. They actually want to reward a team for having a player who can't shoot!

It's almost enough to make an Angry White Dude go off on an X-rated rant!  

As the kids say today ...

On second thought, this is a great idea.  

Let's change a bunch of the rules.

  • First of all, I can't dunk, so let's lower the baskets. Everybody should be able to dunk!
  • I can't go left very well, so let's change the rules to say that you can only guard me on my left side. You can't force me to go left because I can't. I don't want to work on going left, so just change the damn rule!
  • Lets also play with a WNBA basketball. Why? Because I have small hands.
  • While we are at it, I'm 55 now, and I think I could play better if the games were shorter. 12-minute quarters are just 'way too long. Ya feel me, dawg?  
  • Last but not least, lets just play halfcourt. Then nobody would really have to be in shape. Players would last many more years and not worry about conditioning. Play 'til you get out of breath, then sub out and get a moon pie and a coke. When you catch your breath -- and after you smoke a cigarette -- get your patootie back in the game!!

Radio knotheads, you're amazing! Let's reward players for not working on their games and not being very good at things that all of us expect a professional basketball player to be good at.

I'm sure the great readers here at The Daily Player can come up with more rule changes!!

Radio knotheads, do I have to sic John McEnroe on you?

You dudes are about as good at your job as Roberson is at shooting foul shots.