Angry White Dude: Is She Bad At Everything?
We all know that, thankfully, Danica Patrick has walked away from auto racing.
Maybe limped away is a better description.
It must be nice to be good looking. I wouldn't know.
I do know that if you're good looking, doors magically open for you.
There are degrees, though.
Yep. Same as it ever was.
Must've been a low bar for choices.
Who cares if she was one of the worst drivers?
They just did what they do with all ESPN ladies: throw her out there in a sleevless dress and let people stare!
That goes for the promotional circuit, too.
I get it. Lotsa dudes like to look at her. The problems start when she has to a) drive a race car or b) speak.
Think of all of other female athletes who've excelled at their sport! Any one of them would've been a wonderful choice to be the first female host of this silly ESPY show.
However, let's let the hot chick host and tell a few jokes:
Danica's career as a show host and comedian mirrors her career in auto racing.
You might sum it up in two words: Crash and burn.
One thing we now know for sure is there are three things where she's not very good: racing, hosting a show, and being a comedian.
There's always being a pitchster, of course:
She used to get out-hotted in those bits:
We'll let Anna Kendrick sort all that out some day.
Because Danica's got too much to sort out as it is.