Joey Gallo and Nomar Mazara Have Decided to Retire the Celebratory Crotch Grab

The Texas Rangers aren't particularly good at baseball.

However, they do like to keep it weird.

Joey Gallo and Nomar Mazara have been doing some pioneering work in the field of homer celebration, really pushing the envelope and challenging the status quo.

In a recent game against the Angels, Gallo blasted a two-run jack with Mazara on base, setting up this brilliant piece of performance art:

 

Now that's true intimacy.

 

We should also acknowledge the exhaustive analysis of two men fondling one another in public provided by ET Canada, because where else would you go for this sort of thing?

Predictably, the Internet weighed in on the subject:

 

 

 

Hold the butter.

 

However, it appears we won't be seeing this male-genitalia-themed celebration any longer, as the dynamic duo will apparently be retiring this particular act, for somewhat mysterious reasons.

And an entire nation weeps in unison.

 

Sadly, this baseball creativity will now go the way of the dick bump.

 

Disturbing.