Ceremonial First Pitch Theater with Dr Anthony Fauci

At the beginning of the year, the likelihood of leading infectious disease expert Dr Anthony Fauci throwing out the first pitch at the Washington Nationals' home opener would've been comically low.

However, 2020 continues to mock us relentlessly.

As a result, we were indeed treated to a late July MLB Opening Day featuring the 79-year old immunologist attempting to throw a baseball in the general vicinity of home plate in an empty ballpark.

While the honor was certainly deserved, the execution left much to be desired.

 

Sadly, our favorite doctor and baseball enthusiast might need to seek a second opinion on those pitching mechanics.

 

Unfortunately, Fauci now joins a bizarrely diverse group of celebrities, athletes from other sports, musicians and assorted pop culture figures in a club rife with indignity.

However, even though other failed first pitchers have been duly mocked, the hate flowing towards Fauci has taken on a decidedly partisan flavor:

 

 

This is just the type of sophisticated commentary we've come to expect from random Twitter users.

 

Obvious, but still solid.

 

Meanwhile, back at the White House, there was a large baby and malignant narcissist experiencing feelings of rage and insecurity triggered by the continuing popularity of the good doctor.

This individual then fabricated an offer from the New York Yankees to throw out a first pitch at Yankee Stadium, only to cancel the pretend invite shortly thereafter.

Here's a photo of this tragic figure in action:

 

Oh, and there's also this fun little memento:

 

We can only hope Topps can avoid the inevitable ban threat.