Proof of Global Warming: Premiership Drink Breaks

Published on 22-Aug-2015 by Alan Adamsson
Soccer / Soccer Daily Update

Not a drop to drink, apparently.

Mad dogs and Englishmen, they say.

Yeah, right.

The dogs have been abandoned, even though word has it they were hardly even panting.

The same couldn't be said for some of the world's finest footballers, and even the lunch-bucket brigade in Leicester:

Leicester v Spurs drinks break

Who knew 30ºF/86ºF was pressing the bounds of human endurance? Even if there's no such thing as dry heat in England -- and there isn't -- most of the civilized football world was incredulous that its richest league would set such a wussy standard:

Landon Donovan tweet re drink breaks

Hell, back in granddad's day, when millionaires had drink breaks, they had drink breaks:

Actually, looks like the dudes today coulda been popping the bubbly with little fear of lasting harm:

Heat sheet

So, it is time to put in a bit of work on the material for those mid-week amateur nights:

Danny Drinkwater drinking water

Drinkwater and Schlupp

The reality -- discussed when the 2014 World Cup in Brazil opted for drink breaks in high-humidity venues -- is laid out by Dr Markus de Marées from the Cologne Department of Exercise Physiology and High Altitude Medicine, and of course the Germans would have a detail addresser like that in their bureaucracy:

If a team has to go from high temperature conditions to low temperature conditions, then that can affect the team very badly, that's for sure. It's always better to adapt to hot and humid conditions than going back and forward. If a team has to change the conditions often then this negative.

As well, was it any surprise that Mr Doesn't Miss a Trick -- Luis van Gaal -- made the most of water breaks in Brazil? How long will it be until football coaches start consulting with their gridiron and basketball brethren about maximizing maddening stoppages?

Or maybe they'll take a cue from André Miller and use them for another form of okey-dokes:

Who knows? The FA is still fuming -- and justifiably so -- about the 2022 Cup going to Qatar. Maybe the honchos there are as plot-twisty as the British agent in Guy Ritchie's script for The Man from UNCLE, and this is all a scheme to tunnel it.

It's always the chick, isn't it?

Except when it's their devious media plants.

Qatar soccer heat

Qatar soccer heat II

Cunning bastards, they are.

Table 'dailypla_database.metrics_robots' doesn't exist