Rutgers Will Turn Their Home Opener into a Bribe-a-Thon

Fittingly, the Rutgers Scarlet Knights play their home games at High Point Solutions Stadium.

Consider these Big Ten results in Piscataway last season:

• They endured a 78-0 beating there by Michigan,
• Followed later by a 39-0 whitewash at the hands of Penn State.

This season, they've got 2016 CFP participant Washington coming to town for their opener on Fri 1 Sep in the back half of a home-and-home that didn't go so well for Rutgers in Seattle:

John Ross III and a host of key defenders are gone to the NFL, but some observers think the Huskies will be even better in 2017.

Bovada has Washington favored by 30½ points at -110, which is probably a gross underestimate.

Needless to say, the Scarlet Knights truly do need an answer to these high-point blowouts to keep their fans remotely interested in attending.

They think they've found one.

Welcome to the War before the Shore:

• Rutgers is bringing the Boardwalk to Piscataway -- carnivals, food trucks, buskers, and all -- for game day;
• The first 5000 fans will get a promotional beach towel;
• The first 2000 students will get a Scarlet Knights' adidas tank top and a pair of sunglasses; and
• Bands will play at a Block R party.

Damn right there is!

These dudes are going all out to obscure the fact that a college football game is being played in the midst of all this.

So bring on the pièces de resistance:

• They installing a jacuzzi in the rows above the student section, and
• They're gonna have boats -- boats! -- in one end zone where lucky attendees can win an oar and a unique view of ... what's on the schedule? ... right ... the game.

By the second quarter and Washington is naming their own score, what could possibly go wrong in those scenarios?

For all we know, by the fourth quarter, the Huskies' starters will be up there.

Meanwhile, don't forget the kiddie section, replete with inflatable stuff and who-knows-what-else:

Looks like a day of many memories, for those in decent enough shape to have them.

Whether or not that includes game action is irrelevant.

Apparently, that's just what Rutgers wants.